The Second Declaration of Indepencence

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Rules for Vampires

Rules for Vampires

Vampires are powerful and are always seeking more power over others.

Vampires are never satisfied, or should we say sated, and will stick with their agenda until every spare, and not so spare, drop of blood is gone.

Vampires are always properly dressed and can be quite elegant in pursuing their tasks.

Vampires aspire to no rules and will use any ruse to get what they want.

Vampires know that their blood supply is limited and therefore need to create living zombies in order to keep a large and fresh blood supply.

Vampires know that the best way to create zombies is to get zombies to create more zombies.

Vampires are a protected species and one must exercise great care when approaching one.

Killing a vampire is not allowed, however you may try and vote one out of office if you can catch him sleeping in his gerrymandered coffin with his pants down. Beware vampires are also very slippery and hard to catch or confine.

Rules for Zombies

Zombies are programmed to always support vampires, even to their own destruction.

Zombies will enlist Vampires to create vast and impenetrable systems to create more zombies in mass.

Zombies can be found in all walks of life but usually gravitate to the cities where it is easier for them to get their welfare checks, food stamps or find a Starbucks. However some zombies are very well healed and can even possess high levels of education.

Zombies will go to any length and say anything no matter how naïve or stupid, to protect a vampire.

Zombies can become vicious if you speak to them and try to use common sense or facts.

Zombies are repelled by freedom; it is a part of their programming.

Killing a zombie is not allowed, however one can try to revert a zombie to a normal freedom loving human being but be prepared to experience great difficulty with the process.

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